8 HIM posted (7 PAX +1 FNG) for a super hot and humid sweatfest here at #TheRanch.  In honor of shark week YHC’s plan was to have plenty of pools of water (in the form of sweat) and maybe a shark sighting or 2.  No shark named PAX posted, however we did have 1 FNG post, so after a brief intro and disclaimer we were off to feed the fishes…

CHUMMING THE WATER

  • SIDE STRADDLE SQUATS  –  X20  –  IC
  • MOSEY TO SUNLAKE ROUND-A-BOUT
  • SPLITJACKS  –  X20  –  IC
  • MOSEY BACK TO BB COURTS
  • SQUATS  –  X20  –  IC
  • MOSEY TO DEAD END ROUND-A-BOUT
  • WALKING LUNGES  –  X20  –  IC
  • SPRINT TO DEAD END

HERE COME THE SHARKS

  • CIRCLE MERK  –  5 ROUNDS  –  START AT 1 AND INCREASING BY 1 EACH ROUND
  • SUICIDE RUN BURPEES  –  4 CONES SET 10 YDS APART  –  BURPEE AT EACH CONE AND BACK
  • BRUCE LEE-ROY…STED CHICKEN (a.k.a Kung Pow Chicken)  –  All exercises listed below performed IC for double count and double the pain!
  • FLUTTERKICKS  –  X25  –  IC
  • MERKIN  –  X5  –  IC
  • LEG RAISES  –  X25  –  IC
  • DIAMOND MERKIN  –  X5  –  IC
  • AMERICAN HAMMERS  –  X25  –  IC
  • WIDE MERKINS  –  X5  –  IC
  • DYING COCKROACHES  –  X25  –  IC
  • HAND RELEASE MERKINS  –  X10  –  IC
  • FREDDIE MERCURIES  –  X25  –  IC
  • TEMPO MERKINS  –  X10  –  IC
  • LBC’s  –  X25  –  IC
  • CLERKINS  –  X10  –  IC

At this point sheer exhaustion, and what looked like panic, appeared on the faces of many PAX including YHC.  Even some mumble chatter from our FNG Jason about “where did you find this guy at!”  (YHC will definitely take that as a compliment!)  Also we learned a very valuable lesson here that it is darn near impossible to do CLERKINS in cadence.  Just when everyone thought it was safe to breathe again it was time for…

  • ONE MORE SET OF SUICIDE BURPEES
  • MOSEY TO PLAYGROUND

During the mosey the lead pack did a circle back to pick up the 6.  It was at this time 31 min into the beatdown that FNG stated he had another obligation and did his Irish Goodbye.  Perhaps it looks like the sharks got to him and so we were down a man for the remainder of the beatdown.  No worries though as the remaining PAX were amped up to continue pushing themselves to the end.

FEEDING FRENZY

  • TIME TO PARTNER UP
  • ONE PARTNER DOES BURPEE PULLUPS  –  x5  –  OTHER PARTNER DOES DIPS  –  AMRAP  –  THEN SWITCH
  • RINSE AND REPEAT X3 ROUNDS
  • MOSEY TO PAVILLION
  • WALL SITS  –  10 COUNT PER PAX
  • BALLS TO THE WALL  –  10 COUNT PER PAX
  • RINSE AND REPEAT 1 MORE ROUND OF EACH
  • CIRCLE UP FOR SILENT 21s  –  10 BURPEE PENALTY FOR ERRORS

This went 3 rounds total thanks to YHC stopping 1 rep short (strictly on accident…making winky face) in round 1, and Nomad stopping 1 rep late in round 2…BUT…ROUND 3 WE NAILED IT!!!

  • LEAP FROG ACROSS ENTIRE FIELD OF PAIN
  • SPRINT BACK TO PAVILLION TO GRAB WATER BOTTLES
  • MOSEY BACK TO BB COURTS
  • 1 LAST ROUND OF SWEAT ANGELS  –  X10  –  IC  TO FINISH IT OFF

There was no blood in the water, however the pain was real, and more than made up for it as all PAX finished on the ground and continued the name-o-rama from there.

COT

  • Blessings for @haka and his family
  • Prayers for @sanka as he continues the long process of recovery.  Hope to have you back out again sooner than later.
  • Prayers for No-See-Um’s work associate.
  • Prayers for FNG Jason that he comes back and joins us for future beatdowns.
  • Prayers for all those DR and fartsacking that they find a way back soon.

MOLESKIN

  • Awesome job today by everyone, it was a pleasure to cook up some pain and fun.  YHC was very overambitious in the creation of this Q and as a shark sometimes does, “may have bitten off more than he could chew.”
  • Awesome to have a Haka sighting today.  Cannot wait for his return to the beatdowns.
  • No-See-Um leading the way even after a 1 hour pre-beatdown ruck/SOG was impressive.
  • Vanellope always consistent at the head of the pack and motivating the others.
  • DBA pushing himself hard even after his 1 hour ruck took a toll.
  • Nomad making it through the mosey today with a bum knee was motivating.
  • FNG Jason was powering through the initial warmup and cut through the Merkins like butter.  Just hope that we didn’t push him so hard that he does not return.
  • And who can forget the twins Apnea and Fenway as they were pushing each other back and forth to keep the pace as fast as possible.
  • MANY CSAUP OPPORTUNITIES OUT THERE IN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS…CHECK SLACK FOR DETAILS!!!